Bad Song Friday

Warrior - Scandal

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 14 Nov 2008 19:50:00 +0000

Image by Getty Images via DaylifeIt's that time again! Today's entry is courtesy of Debbie again. It's bad. However, the badness of the song is overshadowed by the badness of the below video, a fan-made disaster of epic proportions.

You run, run...run away
It's your heart...that you betray
Feeding on...your hungry eyes
I bet you're not so civilized
Well, isn't love..primitive
A wild gift...that you wanna give
Break out of captivity
And follow me, stereo jungle child
Love is the kill.....your heart's still wild

Chorus:
Shootin' at the walls of heartache, bang, bang, I am the warrior
Well I am the warrior, and heart to heart you'll win..if you survive
the warrior....the warrior

You talk, talk, you talk to me
Your eyes touch me physically
Stay with me, we'll take the night
As passion takes another bite

Who's the hunter...who's the game?
I feel the beat...call your name
I hold you close...in victory
I don't wanna tame your animal style..
you won't be caged...in the call of the wild....

Repeat Chorus
Shootin' at the walls of heartache (shootin' at the walls of heartache)
The warrior.....
I am the warrior, and heart to heart you'll win...if you survive
The warrior...the warrior

Where have you guys been?

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Sat, 01 Nov 2008 20:52:00 +0000

Image via Wikipedia

Wow! We're still here! Amazing. It's good to see you again. There are so many bad songs still out there to talk about and make fun of - there's more every day. I'm sure you can think of one or two. We just did - Heartbeat by Don Johnson is detailed below. Make fun of it in the comments. We will too. If we all work together, we can make lots and lots of fun.

We already have next friday's entry all ready, so you have some catching up to do. I hope you can find time and the inclination to get it done.

Also, god DAMN it's good to be posting here again. We love all of you.

Heartbeat - Don Johnson

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Sat, 01 Nov 2008 20:28:00 +0000

In the vein of She's Like The Wind by Patrick Swayze, some idiot thought it would be a good idea if Don Johnson traded on his Miami Vice fame, and released some music. This howler is the result. Note to Don Johnson: Never. Again.

I don't care what you say
you can give it away

Your money don't mean much to me.
I've been out on my own
gonna got it alone now

'Cause that's the way it's got to be.
Everybody tells me how I can beat the odds for now.
Well
I've been standing by the fire
but I just can't feel the heat.

Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat

Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat
beating like mine.

Looking at me
it's easy to see

You think you know iust how I feel.
If you do to me wrong and it won't take me long

Before my restless heart will heal.
I'm looking for a love
love like mine

They tell me it's so hard to find

But I can feel it in the rhythm of the heartbeat in the street.

Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat

Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat

Beating like mine
beating like mine.
Tell me what you feel now without the heartbeat

Tell me is it real now without the heartbeat?

Heartbeat - I'm looking for a heartbeat. (12x)

We Built This City - Starship

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 28 Dec 2007 18:14:00 +0000

Oh Grace Slick, how could you? There's very little I need to say about this week's selection. Blender magazine voted it the worst song of all time a few years ago.

We built this city,
We built this city on rock and roll

Say you don't know me, or recognize my face
Say you don't care who goes to that kind of place
Knee deep in the hoopla, sinking in your fight
Too many runaways eating up the night

Marconi plays the Mamba,
Listen to the radio
Don't you remember?
We built this city
We built this city on rock and roll!
We built this city, we built this city on rock and roll
Built this city, we built this city on rock and roll

Someone always playing corporation games
Who cares they're always changing corporation names
We just want to dance here, someone stole the stage
They call us irresponsible, write us off the page

Marconi plays the Mamba,
Listen to the radio
Don't you remember?
We built this city
We built this city on rock and roll!
We built this city, we built this city on rock and roll
Built this city, we built this city on rock and roll

It's just another Sunday in a tired old street
Police have got the choke hold, and we just lost the beat

Who counts the money underneath the bar
Who rides the wrecking ball into our guitars
Don't tell us you need us, 'cause we're the ship of fools
Looking for America, crawling through your schools

Don't you remember ...

Marconi plays the Mamba,
Listen to the radio -
Don't you remember?
We built this city,
We built this city on rock and roll
We built this city, we built this city on rock and roll
Built this city, we built this city on rock and roll
Built this city, we built this city on rock and roll
Built this city, we built this city on rock and roll

We built, we built this city yeah
We built this city
We built, we built this city
(Repeat - fade)

From A Distance - Bette Midler

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 17:53:00 +0000

I'm amazed that we've been doing this for 9 months, and this is the first Bette Midler song we've had. I mean, we could basically pick anything from her catalog and have a winner. The Rose? Fuck me. Wind Beneath My Wings? Kill me now.

Anyway, this one has perhaps the most stick-in-your-head syrup of any of them.

The following video is Bette's warbling song done (and done very very well) by the "Candy Capped Crusader". I'll let you be the judge of what that means.

From a distance
The world looks blue and green
And the snow capped mountains white
From a distance
The ocean meets the stream
And the eagle takes to flight

From a distance
There is harmony
And it echoes through the land
It's the voice of hope
It's the voice of peace
It's the voice of every man

From a distance
We all have enough
And no one is in need
And there are no guns,
No bombs and no disease,
No hungry mouths to feed

From a distance
We are instruments
Marching in a common band
Playing songs of hope
Playing songs of peace
They are the songs of every man
God is watching us
God is watching us
God is watching us
From a distance

From a distance
You look like my friend
Even though we are at war
From a distance
I just cannot comprehend
What all this fighting's for

From a distance
There is harmony
And it echoes through the land
And it's the hope of hopes
It's the love of loves
It's the heart of every man

God is watching us
God is watching us
God is watching us
From a distance

God is watching us
God is watching us
God is watching us
From a distance...

Stairway to Heaven - The Beatnix

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Wed, 19 Dec 2007 22:16:00 +0000

Special bonus Wednesday post!

I'm not even sure what to make of this. You just have to watch it. I think the original song qualifies for BSF-hood, but this version and the accompanying video are mesmerizing in a really bad way.

Christmas Wrapping - The Waitresses

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 14 Dec 2007 19:08:00 +0000

Debbie: I'm sure I will be hated for choosing this song and I will admit at one point to liking it. Now, however, I am sick of it and it makes me dread the holidays. My goal is to make it through one Christmas season without hearing it once.

I so disagree. I'm posting it anyway, just so my objection is noted, but I love this song and look forward to hearing it all year long. I'm going to play it even more now that I've had to post it here.

The version Save Ferris does is great as well.

Here's a video of the Spice Girls' version of the song, made by some drunk chicks or something. Now that's entertainment!

"Bah, humbug!" No, that's too strong
'Cause it is my favorite holiday
But all this year's been a busy blur
Don't think I have the energy

To add to my already mad rush
Just 'cause it's 'tis the season.
The perfect gift for me would be
Completions and connections left from

Last year, ski shop,
Encounter, most interesting.
Had his number but never the time
Most of '81 passed along those lines.

So deck those halls, trim those trees
Raise up cups of Christmas cheer,
I just need to catch my breath,
Christmas by myself this year.

Calendar picture, frozen landscape,
Chilled this room for twenty-four days,
Evergreens, sparkling snow
Get this winter over with!

Flashback to springtime, saw him again,
Would've been good to go for lunch,
Couldn't agree when we were both free,
We tried, we said we'd keep in touch.

Didn't, of course, 'til summertime,
Out to the beach to his boat could I join him?
No, this time it was me,
Sunburn in the third degree.

Now the calendar's just one page
And, of course, I am excited
Tonight's the night, but I've set my mind
Not to do too much about it.

Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I'll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I'll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I'll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I'll miss this one this year.

Hardly dashing through the snow
Cause I bundled up too tight
Last minute have-to-dos
A few cards a few calls
'Cause it's R-S-V-P
No thanks, no party lights
It's Christmas Eve, gonna relax
Turned down all of my invites.

Last fall I had a night to myself,
Same guy called, Halloween party,
Waited all night for him to show,
This time his car wouldn't go,

Forget it, it's cold, it's getting late,
Trudge on home to celebrate
In a quiet way, unwind
Doing Christmas right this time.

A&P has provided me
With the world's smallest turkey
Already in the oven, nice and hot
Oh damn! Guess what I forgot?

So on with the boots, back out in the snow
To the only all-night grocery,
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
In the line is that guy I've been chasing all year!

"I'm spending this one alone," he said.
"Need a break; this year's been crazy."
I said, "Me too, but why are you?
You mean you forgot cranberries too?"

Then suddenly we laughed and laughed
Caught on to what was happening
That Christmas magic's brought this tale
To a very happy ending!

Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn't miss this one this year!
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn't miss this one this year!

Umbrella - Rihanna

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 17:30:00 +0000

From Debbie:

In honor of the 4 day weekend, this is a special Thanksgiving Eve edition of BSF. Last week I picked a song that Pash liked, causing him much dismay. This week I've chosen a song I actually like but acknowledge is bad. If you don't know it, go ahead and watch the video at MTV.com. I guarantee you'll be singing the chorus all weekend.

Good choice, honey. I would've picked this earlier but I figured it was too new to really count. It's bad, though, so it definitely fits. Any song that includes "I'ma" in the lyrics is automatically a bad song.

Also, Rihanna == hot.

Here's your crappy video and some lyrics:

You have my heart
And we'll never be worlds apart
May be in magazines
But you'll still be my star
Baby cause in the dark
You can't see shiny cars
And that's when you need me there
With you I'll always share
Because

[Chorus]
When the sun shines, we'll shine together
Told you I'll be here forever
Said I'll always be a friend
Took an oath I'ma stick it out till the end
Now that it's raining more than ever
Know that we'll still have each other
You can stand under my umbrella
You can stand under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh eh eh eh)

These fancy things, will never come in between
You're part of my entity, here for Infinity
When the war has took it's part
When the world has dealt it's cards
If the hand is hard, together we'll mend your heart
Because

[Chorus]
When the sun shines, we'll shine together
Told you I'll be here forever
Said I'll always be a friend
Took an oath I'ma stick it out till the end
Now that it's raining more than ever
Know that we'll still have each other
You can stand under my umbrella
You can stand under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh eh eh eh)

You can run into my arms
It's okay don't be alarmed
Come here to me
There's no distance in between our love
So go on and let the rain pour
I'll be all you need and more
Because

[Chorus]
When the sun shines, we'll shine together
Told you I'll be here forever
Said I'll always be a friend
Took an oath I'ma stick it out till the end
Now that it's raining more than ever
Know that we'll still have each other
You can stand under my umbrella
You can stand under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella
(Ella ella eh eh eh eh eh eh)

It's raining
Ooh baby it's raining
Baby come here to me
Come here to me
It's raining
Oh baby it's raining

Baby Baby - Amy Grant

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Thu, 15 Nov 2007 14:03:00 +0000

From Debbie:

This is a special early edition of bad song Friday. The occasion you ask? Two of our regular BSF participants, Jeff and Heather, are going in tomorrow to give birth (well Heather's doing that part) to their new baby daughter. They won't share her name with us, so Sierra has dubbed her Kandi Cane.

Kandi Cane, this one's for you. I can't wait to meet you tomorrow.

Amen. Except I think it's spelled "Kandi Kayne". That definitely looks better to me.

I don't agree on the song choice. Sure, it's stick-in-your-head repetitive, and fits the mold for other BSF choices, but I always liked this one. Plus, Amy Grant = Hot.

Baby, baby
I'm taken with the notion
To love you with the sweetest of devotion.

Baby, baby
My tender love will flow from
The bluest sky to the deepest ocean.

Stop for a minute
Baby, I'm so glad you're mine, yeah
You're mine.

Baby, baby
The stars are shining for you
And just like me I'm sure that they adore you.

Baby, baby
Go walking through the forest
The birds above a' singing you a chorus.

Stop for a minute
Baby, they're so glad you're mine, oh yeah
And ever since the day you put my heart in motion
Baby I realize that there's just no getting over you.

Baby, baby
In any kind of weather
I'm here for you always and forever.

Baby, baby
No muscle man could sever
My love for you is true and it will never

Stop for a minute
Baby, they're so glad you're mine
And ever since the day you put my heart in motion
Baby I realize that there's just no getting over you.

And ever since the day you put my heart in motion
Baby I realize that there's just no getting over you.
Over you.

Baby, baby
Always and forever
Baby I'm so glad that
Here for you baby
So glad you're mine
Baby I'm so glad that
When I think about you it makes me smile
Baby, baby be mine
Baby I'm so glad that
Don't stop giving love
Don't stop, no
Baby I'm so glad that you're mine
Baby I'm so glad
Baby I'm so glad that
When I think about you it makes me smile.

Whitney Houston - How Will I Know

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 21:23:00 +0000

From Debbie: I'll be dancing to this ditty all weekend. Too bad Pash and Jeff can't play it on Guitar Hero.

Oh my gawd, how awful. It's already stuck in my head, and all I read was the name of the song. Why couldn't Whitney have gotten strung out on crack before she released this one? The lyrics read like something a lovesick 12-year-old might have written.

Here's your craptastic video (some kinda weird anime thing) and lyrics.

There's a boy I know, he's the one I dream of
Looks into my eyes, takes me to the clouds above
Ooh I lose control, cant seem to get enough
When I wake from dreaming, tell me is it really love

Chorus:
How will I know (dont trust your feelings)
How will I know
How will I know (love can be deceiving)
How will I know
How will I know if he really loves me
I say a prayer with every heart beat
I fall in love whenever we meet
I'm asking you what you know about these things
How will I know if he's thinking of me
I try to phone but I'm too shy (can't speak)
Falling in love is all bitter sweet
This love is strong why do I feel weak

Oh, wake me, I'm shaking, wish I had you near me now
Said there's no mistaking, what I feel is really love

Chorus

If he loves me, if he loves me not (x3)

Chorus

Whitesnake - Here I Go Again

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 02 Nov 2007 16:07:00 +0000

Debbie picked this weeks entry, the first in nearly a month. We're lazy, what can I say?

Ahhhh, Tawny, Tawny, Tawny. You were so young and tender and desirable. What happened to you? Life weighed down on you, and the years stacked up, and tempered your beauty with cares and botox. Alas! Fear not, my flexible friend, we will always have the hood of that Jaguar.

Is it just me, or was David Coverdale already impossibly ancient when this song came out? He looked like he could be 70 years old.

Debbie: It's a beautiful image. A girl dancing around on a car totally in lust with a 70 year old who uses the band name "White Snake". There's nothing like 70 yr. old white snake... I think that's what ultimately did her in.

Wait. Was White Snake a euphemism for something else? I don't get it. I mean, a 70 year old white snake would be pretty amazing, I think, something for the zoo and the Guinness book, but I don't know why one would do her in, unless it was poisonous. Unless you're saying David Coverdale... Oh, I get it. He was poisonous for her. Wow, we come up with some deeeeeeeep stuff around here, don't we?

Debbie: I don't think a 70 yr. old white snake could go very deep.

Wait a minute. You're talking about sex, aren't you? Oh. My. God. That is so depraved. And here I thought we were having a theoretical discussion about how old rock stars are dangerous to hot flexible hood dancers. Disgusting, you people.

Anyway. Here's a vid and some lyrics. Awful stuff, I've been humming it all day.

I don't know where I'm going
But, I sure know where Ive been
Hanging on the promises
In songs of yesterday
And I've made up my mind,
I ain't wasting no more time
But, here I go again
Here I go again

Tho' I keep searching for an answer,
I never seem to find what I'm looking for
Oh lord, I pray
You give me strength to carry on,
cos' I know what it means
To walk along the lonely street of dreams

And here I go again on my own
Goin' down the only road I've ever known,
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
And I've made up my mind
I ain't wasting no more time

I'm just another heart in need of rescue,
Waiting on love's sweet charity
An I'm gonna hold on
For the rest of my days,
cos' I know what it means
To walk along the lonely street of dreams

And here I go again on my own
Goin' down the only road I've ever known,
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
And I've made up my mind
I ain't wasting no more time

But, here I go again,
Here I go again,
Here I go again,
Here I go...

An I've made up my mind,
I ain't wasting no more time

And here I go again on my own
Goin' down the only road I've ever known,
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
cos' I know what it means
To walk along the lonely street of dreams

And here I go again on my own
Goin' down the only road I've ever known,
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
And I've made up my mind
I ain't wasting no more time...

But, here I go again,
Here I go again,
Here I go again,
Here I go,
Here I go again...

Gunther - Tutti Frutti Summer Love

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 17:20:00 +0000

I was casting about for a new song to post today, and on a whim googled "bad song friday" to see what would come up besides this site. Lo and behold, there's a guy named Mark Percival who's posted a couple BSF entries on his blog (is this a case of GMTA, or is he perhaps a friend of a friend?) The most recent one is a doozy. I've never heard the song before, but it has all the BSF qualities - stupid inane lyrics, stick-in-your-brain catchiness, derivative music, and a video that will make you spit coffee out your nose. Check this shit out:

It's a crazy, crazy night
Having you here right by my side
It's a crazy summer night
Cause you make me feel so alive
Tutti frutti summer love (mmmh, ahhh)

It's a crazy, crazy night
Having you here right by my side
It's a crazy summer night
Cause you make me feel so alive
It's a crazy summer love (mmmh, ahhh)

Honey, you're so cute
This is the land of forbidden fruit
Bananas, melonas, yeah
It's a hot, hot summer love (Yeah)

You can make me do all those crazy things I never dared
It's a no-no (No!)
And you like it
Darling, you're the one and only; yes, I swear
Tutti frutti summer love

It's a crazy, crazy night
Having you here right by my side
It's a crazy summer night
Cause you make me feel so alive
It's a crazy summer love

oooo oooo ayo (Yeah)
Tutti frutti summer love

oooo oooo ayo
It's a crazy summer love
A summer love

You come and take your chance
And do the naked dance
Bananas, melonas, yeah
It's a hot, hot summer love (mmmh)

You can make me do all those crazy things I never dared
It's a no-no (No!)
And you like it
Darling, you're the one and only; yes, I swear
Tutti frutti summer love

It's a crazy, crazy night
Having you here right by my side
It's a crazy summer night
Cause you make me feel so alive
It's a crazy summer love

oooo oooo ayo (Yeah)
Tutti frutti summer love

oooo oooo ayo
A summer love

It's a no-no
And I like it
It's a no-no
Teasing me
It's a no-no
And you like it
It's a no-no (I like it)
Come with me
Yeah

oooo oooo ayo
Crazy, crazy summer love
oooo oooo ayo
oooo oooo ayo
Tutti frutti summer love

It's a crazy, crazy night
Having you here right by my side
It's a crazy summer night
Cause you make me feel so alive
It's a crazy summer love

It's a crazy, crazy night
Having you here right by my side
It's a crazy summer night
Cause you make me feel so alive
It's a crazy summer love

Tutti frutti summer love

One Night In Bangkok - Murray Head

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 28 Sep 2007 17:26:00 +0000

Bill sent this along, but I didn't know what it was off the top of my head. It took viewing this video to bring all the horror back.

Bangkok, oriental setting
The city don't know what the city is getting
The creme-de-la-creme of the chess world in a show with everything but
Yule Brenner

Time flies, doesn't seem a minute
Since the ________ had the chess boys in it
All change, don't you know that when you
Play at this level it's no ordinary venue
It's Iceland, or the Philippines, or Hastings, or... or this place

One night in Bangkok and the world's your oyster
The bars are temples but the pearls ain't free
You'll find a God in every golden cluster
And if your lucky than the God's a she
I can feel an angel sliding up to me

One town's very like another
When your head's down over your pieces, brother
(it's a drag, it's a bore, it's really such a pity
to be looking at the board, not looking at the city)
What do you mean, you've seen one crowded, polluted, stinking town....
(___________________)
Get tied, you're talking to a tourist whose every move's among the
purest
I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine

One night in Bangkok makes a hard man humble
Not much between despair and ecstasy
One night in Bangkok and the tough guys tumble
Can't be to careful with your company
I can feel the devil walking next to me

Siam's gonna be the witness
To the ultimate test of cerebral fitness
This grips me more than would a muddy old river
Or a 'clining Buddha
And thank God I'm only watching the game, controlling it

I don't see you guys rating
The kind of mate I'm contemplating
I'd let you watch, I would invite you
But the Queen's wheels would not excite you
So you better go back to your bars, your temples
Your massage parlors

One night in Bangkok and the world's your oyster
The bars are temples but the pearls ain't free
You'll find a God in every golden cluster
A little flesh, a little history
I can feel an angel sliding up to me

One night in Bangkok
Makes a hard man humble
Not much between despair and ecstasy
One night in Bangkok and the tough guys crumble
Can't be to careful with your company
I can feel the devil walking next to me

Lovefool - The Cardigans

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 21 Sep 2007 19:01:00 +0000

In honor of the episode of The Office that I watched the other night, here's a song that may not be "bad" per se, but certainly gets stuck in your head and refuses to leave. It's like a tick.

Here's the video from the Office episode that put me onto it:

Dear, I fear we're facing a problem
you love me no longer, I know
and maybe there is nothing
that I can do to make you do
Mama tells me I shouldn't bother
that I ought to stick to another man
a man that surely deserves me
but I think you do!

So I cry, and I pray and I beg

Love me love me
say that you love me
fool me fool me
go on and fool me
love me love me
pretend that you love me
leave me leave me
just say that you need me

So I cried, and I begged for you to
Love me love me
say that you love me
leave me leave me
just say that you need me
I can't care about anything but you

Lately I have desperately pondered,
spent my nights awake and I wonder
what I could do have done in another way
to make you stay
Reason will not lead to solution
I will end up lost in confusion
I don't care if you really care
as long as you don't go

So I cry, I pray and I beg

Love me love me
say that you love me
fool me fool me
go on and fool me
love me love me
pretend that you love me
leave me leave me
just say that you need me

So I cried, and I begged for you to
Love me love me
say that you love me
leave me leave me
just say that you need me
I can't care about anything but you

Love me love me
say that you love me
fool me fool me
go on and fool me
Love me love me
I know that you need me
I can't care about anything but you

Bonus song: Gimme More - Britney Spears

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 14 Sep 2007 18:26:00 +0000

I can't help piling on. After hearing this stupid vibraphone tune so many times this week, and singing it under my breath for most of that time, I believe it most definitely qualifies for BSF greatness. Also, I have a video you're not going to believe to go after it, so be sure to scroll down past the lyrics for that. Also also, who knew this song had so many fucking lyrics? Jesus.

(It's Britney, bitch)
(I see you, and I just wanna dance with you)

Everytime they turn the lights down
Just wanna go that extra mile for you
You got public display of affection
Feel's like no one else in the room (but you)

We can get down like there's no one around
We'll keep on rockin' (We'll keep on rockin')
We'll keep on rockin' (Keep on rockin')

Cameras are flashing while we're dirty dancing
They keep watchin' (They keep watchin')
Keep watchin
Feels like the crowd is saying

[CHORUS]
Gimme gimme more
Gimme more
Gimme gimme more
Gimme gimme more
Gimme (Uh)
Gimme gimme more
Gimme gimme more
Gimme more
Gimme gimme more
Gimme gimme more
Gimme (Uh)
Gimme gimme more

A center of attention (Can you feel that?)
Even when they're up against the wall
You got me in a crazy position (Yeah)
If you're on a mission (Uh-uh)
You got my permission (Oh)

We can get down like there's no one around
We'll keep on rockin' (Keep on rockin')
We'll keep on rockin', rockin' (Oh ah ha)

Cameras are flashing while we're dirty dancing
They keep watchin' (Wait)
Keep watchin
(Feel's like the crowd is saying)

[CHORUS]
Gimme gimme more
Gimme more
Gimme gimme more
Gimme gimme more
[Gimme More lyrics on http://www.metrolyrics.com]

Gimme (Uh)
Gimme gimme more
Gimme gimme more
Gimme more
Gimme gimme more
Gimme gimme more
Gimme (Uh)
Gimme gimme more

(I just can't control myself, oh)
(They want more? Well I'll give'em more, oh!)

[CHORUS]
Gimme gimme more
Gimme more
Gimme gimme more (Gimme more)
Gimme gimme more
Gimme (Uh)
Gimme gimme more (Ooh)
Gimme gimme more
Gimme more
Gimme gimme more
Gimme gimme more (Gimme more, oh yeah)
Gimme (Uh)
Gimme gimme more

Ohh, gimme more, gimme more (More)
Gimme more, gimme more baby
I just wanna more

[CHORUS]
Gimme gimme
Gimme
Gimme gimme more
Gimme gimme
Gimme (Ooh)
Gimme gimme more
Gimme gimme
Gimme
Gimme gimme more
Gimme gimme
Gimme (Ooh)
Gimme gimme

Bet you didn't see this one coming
The incredible Lygo
The lengendary Miss Britney Spears, haha
And the unstoppable Danja
Ha, you gonna have to remove me
Cause I ain't goin' no where, haha
(More)

I realize this guy is like an actor or performance artist, but just watch it for what it's worth. Bahahaha, I'm still laughing.

Feelings - Morris Albert

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 14 Sep 2007 15:47:00 +0000

From Bill: "This guy is a giant fatty triangle."

I thought that was a woman who sang that. So I guess in a way we're both right.

Today's video is a keeper. In honor of the upcoming Bionic Woman series, here's Jamie Sommers singing Bill's song. Check out the happenin' audience at the end, and Jamie's weird 70's Eckankar outfit.

Feelings, nothing more than feelings
Trying to forget my feelings of love
Teardrops rolling down on my face
Trying to forget my feelings of love

Feelings, for all my life I'll feel it
I wish I've never met you, girl
You'll never come again
Feeling, woo-o-o feeling
Woo-o-o, feel you again in my arms

Feelings, feelings like I've never lost you
And feelings like I'll never have you again in my heart

Feelings, for all my life I'll feel it
I wish I've never met you, girl; you'll never come again

Feelings, feelings like I've never lost you
And feelings like I'll never have you again in my life

Feelings, woo-o-o feeling it,
woo-o-o, feeling again in my arms
Feelings

Ebony & Ivory - Michael Jackson & Paul McCartney

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 07 Sep 2007 21:51:00 +0000

Dr. Jeff sent another entry for today, nearly as insidious as the last one:

"When I'm thinking homicidal thoughts during a Michael Jackson song, he's usually singing with his good buddy Paul McCartney.

'Ebony and Ivory... living together in perfect harmony
Side by side on my piano keyboard... oh, lord... why don't we!!!!!!'

You are all welcome. Happy weekend... good luck drinking that tune out of your head."

Ebony and ivory live together in perfect harmony
Side by side on my piano keyboard, oh lord, why don't we?
We all know that people are the same where ever we go
There is good and bad in everyone,
We learn to live, we learn to give
Each other what we need to survive together alive.

Ebony and ivory live together in perfect harmony
Side by side on my piano keyboard, oh lord why don't we?

Ebony, ivory living in perfect harmony
Ebony, ivory, ooh

We all know that people are the same where ever we go
There is good and bad in everyone,
We learn to live, we learn to give
Each other what we need to survive together alive.

Ebony and ivory live together in perfect harmony
Side by side on my piano keyboard, oh lord why don't we?

Ebony, ivory living in perfect harmony (repeat and fade)

We Are The World - USA For Africa

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 07 Sep 2007 18:22:00 +0000

After taking a week off to go see the best band in the best venue on Earth, we're back with a song so insipid, so frighteningly bad, that I fear to actually post it. To make up for the damage we're doing to your psyche, I found this kick ass cover of the song by a bunch of Swiss punks. It's still bad, but at least it's campy bad instead of bleeding ears bad:

There comes a time
When we head a certain call
When the world must come together as one
There are people dying
And it's time to lend a hand to life
The greatest gift of all

We can't go on
Pretending day by day
That someone, somewhere will soon make a change
We are all a part of
God's great big family
And the truth, you know love is all we need

[Chorus]
We are the world
We are the children
We are the ones who make a brighter day
So let's start giving
There's a choice we're making
We're saving our own lives
It's true we'll make a better day
Just you and me

Send them your heart
So they'll know that someone cares
And their lives will be stronger and free
As God has shown us by turning stone to bread
So we all must lend a helping hand

[Chorus]
We are the world
We are the children
We are the ones who make a brighter day
So let's start giving
There's a choice we're making
We're saving our own lives
It's true we'll make a better day
Just you and me

When you're down and out
There seems no hope at all
But if you just believe
There's no way we can fall
Well, well, well, well, let us realize
That a change will only come
When we stand together as one

[Chorus]
We are the world
We are the children
We are the ones who make a brighter day
So let's start giving
There's a choice we're making
We're saving our own lives
It's true we'll make a better day
Just you and me

What's Up - 4 Non Blondes

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 17:53:00 +0000

From Debbie: "Ok, so this will probably be a controversial choice, but I HATE this song. Maybe at one point it was alright, but listening to too many drunk people scream this out in a Karaoke bar has ruined it. I'd rather chew on tin foil while someone runs their nails down a chalkboard than listen to this song."

Today's accompanying video is possibly the funniest video ever posted on Youtube, let alone on this site. It's Gay He-Man and his gay friends with a special rendition. I LOLlerskated through this whole thing.

25 years of my life and still
I'm trying to get up that great big hill of hope
For a destination
I realised quickly when i knew i should
That the world was made up of this
Brotherhood of man
For whatever that means
So i cry sometimes when i'm lying in bed
To get it all out what's in my head
Then i start feeling a little peculiar
So i wake in the morning and i step
Outside i take deep breath
I get real high
Then i scream from the top of my lungs
What's goin' on
And i say hey...
And i say hey what's goin' on
And i say hey...
I said hey what's goin' on
And i try, oh my god do i try
I try all the time
In this institution
And i pray, oh my god do i pray
I pray every single day
For a revolution
So i cry sometimes when i'm lying in my bed
To get it all out what's in my head
Then i start feeling a little peculiar
So i wake in the morning and i step outside
I take a deep breath then i get real high
Then i scream from the top of my lungs
What's goin' on
And i say hey...
And i said hey what's goin' on
And i say hey...
I said hey what's goin' on
And i say hey...
And i said hey what's goin' on
And i say hey...
I said hey what's goin' on
25 years of my life and still
I'm trying to get up that great big hill of hope
For a destination

She's Like The Wind - Patrick Swayze

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 19:25:00 +0000

Hello again friends, and sorry for the extended absence. I guess we all forgot about the most important tradition in our lives.

But no longer! Bill sent along today's entry (about which he says "Patrick Swayze rules! One of the heavyweights of American pussy music!"), and I found the perfect video to go with it. If you thought the song was bad, wait'll you see how putting it to these images introduces a really uncomfortable, voyeur-into-forbidden-love thing. It's icky. Anyway, enjoy!

She's like the wind through my tree
She rides the night next to me
She leads me through moonlight
Only to burn me with the sun
She's taken my heart
But she doesn't know what she's done

Feel her breath on my face
Her body close to me
Can't look in her eyes
She's out of my league
Just a fool to believe
I have anything she needs
She's like the wind

[SOLO]

I look in the mirror and all I see
Is a young old man with only a dream
Am I just fooling myself
That she'll stop the pain
Living without her
I'd go insane

Feel her breath on my face
Her body close to me
Can't look in her eyes
She's out of my league
Just a fool to believe
I have anything she needs
She's like the wind

Feel your breath on my face
Your body close to me
Can't look in your eyes
You're out of my league
Just a fool to believe
(Just a fool to believe)
She's like the wind
(Just a fool to believe)
Just a fool to believe
(She's like the wind)
Just a fool to believe
(Just a fool to believe)
She's like the wind
(Just a fool to believe)
Just a fool to believe
She's like the wind

(Just a fool...)
(She's like the wind)
(She's like the wind)
(Just a fool...)
(She's like the wind)
(Just a fool...)

Hanging Tough - New Kids on the Block

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 27 Jul 2007 17:01:00 +0000

OMG, OMG. This song did not get better with age. Actually reading and listening to the lyrics clarifies what I always believed about NKotB - they're creatures sent by Beelzebub to interfere with rational thought. They're eeeeeeeeeeeeevil.

This video is the song put to scenes from Buffy. I like the show, but there's some hilarity in the juxtaposition. See how I use big words?

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Listen up everybody if you wanna take a chance.
(rap:) just get on the floor and do the new kids’ dance.
Don’t worry ’bout nothing ’cause it won’t take long.
(rap:) we’re gonna put you in a trance with a funky song, ’cause you gotta be
Hangin’ tough, hangin’ tough, hangin’ tough.
(rap:) we’re rough.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Everybody’s always talkin’ ’bout who’s on top.
(rap:) don’t cross our path ’cause you’re gonna get stomped.
We ain’t gonna give anybody any slack.
(rap:) and if you try to keep us down we’re gonna come right back,
And you know we’re
Hangin’ tough, hangin’ tough, hangin’ tough.
(rap:) are you tough enough?
Hangin’ tough, hangin’ tough, hangin’ tough.
(rap:) we’re rough.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
(instrumental break)
Get loose everybody ’cause we’re gonna do our thing.
(rap:) ’cause you know it ain’t over ’till the fat lady sings.
Hangin’ tough, hangin’ tough, hangin’ tough.
(rap:) are you tough enough?
Hangin’ tough, hangin’ tough, hangin’ tough.
(rap:) we’re rough.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, just hangin’ tough, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, hangin’ tough.
(repeat & fade)

Bremelo - Sir Mix-A-Lot

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 20 Jul 2007 18:15:00 +0000

Our friend Jeff sent along this bonus entry today. The lyrics are actually funny as hell; I think the subject matter qualifies it as a Bad Song.

I couldn't find any sort of video for it, but I did find this clip of His Mixness talking about the origin of the song and his Bremerton experiences:

Sir Mix-A-Lot on Bremerton and its 'los

Here's a gory kinda story, 'bout an obese freak
With a forty inch waist and a ten inch beak,
Overweight and out of shape with a triple chin,
Her brassiere strikes fear in the hearts of men,

The Girls a bremelo
The Girls a bremelo

Me and Terry hopped a ferry, we were lookin Swass
When a dip hit the ship we were almost tossed
It was a big bremelo standing on my toe,
An enormous jelly-belly tryin' to say hello
I was really kinda frightened as she looked my way,
I tried to run because here buns made the ferry sway
To be blunt she was fat and ready for combat
On the way to Bremerton where the fat is at,
The Girls a bremelo.

Let's Go!

I'm not fakin' or mistaken' 'bout the big ol' duck,
She had hairy underarms and a whoppin' gut,
Her hair was short and wavy, drove my pit bull crazy,
A Bremerton beast chasin' fella's in the Navy,
At the movie she's the feature, the Bremerton creature,
Ya' wear a life jacket if ya ever try and freak her
Look at her physique, she ain't my kinda freak,
The floor creaks when the beast starts reaching her peak
The Girls a bremelo.
She's just a bremelo.

Change the beat!

You can't ignore the way she snores 'cuz she blows down doors,
Baby's got the kinda face only a mother adores,
A big basket ball head, with her ten inch feet,
Big lips, No hips, with the smell of a beast,
I couldn't put her in my Caddy or my tranny would break,
I've heard of dirt because of poverty, but she took the cake,
When it comes to Kool-Aid©, the girl would drink it in pints,
Ya go to school for twenty years and ya still in the ninth?
Ya just a bremelo.
Just a bremelo.

You big, triple chinned, unattractive duck,
Ya boyfriend beats freaks up to make a buck,
Hangin' 'round Third & Pike on a ten speed bike,
you could say that I'm a liar, but ya know I'm right
Ya talk behind my back because I dropped you flat,
And ya never take a shower 'cuz ya too damn fat
So ya man was smart when he broke your heart
Because if Mix-A-Lot'd cut cha youd'a fell apart
Wearing Polyester slacks with elastic in the back
You could flat'n squash a nigga in a wrestling match
Ya got lips like a character in some cartoon
With a pink posterior ya big baboon
Ya just a (Elephant Trumpet)
(Elephant Trumpet)

Now Bremerton's a city right outside of mine,
Most girls there are ducks but a few are fine
But the ones that I speak about, use their faces catching trout,
Vacuum cleaners for a mouth, You know what I'm talkin' 'bout
Mud Ducks, Hocky Pucks, Drivers of Mack© trucks,
Lame brains, Deisel Trains, to pick them up you have to strain,
Big Butt, Crew Cut, Extra-Ordinary Gut,
Big Mamma kinda bod, make ya kinda rough

Two Out of Three Ain't Bad - Meat Loaf

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 20 Jul 2007 18:12:00 +0000

From Debbie, who especially likes the stuttering lyrics.

Here's a video someone made that fits the song great, cause the show is obviously an insipid nightmare:

Baby we can talk a-all night, but that ain't getting us nowhere
I told you everything I possibly can, there's nothin' left inside of here
And maybe you can cry a-all night, but that'll never cha-ange the way that I feel
The snow is really piling up outside, I wish you wouldn't make me lea-eave here
I poured it on and I poured it ou-out, I tried to show you just how much I care
I'm tired of words and I'm too hoarse to shout
But you've been cold to me so long, I'm cryin' icicles instead of tears

And all I can do, is keep on tellin' you
I want you (I want you), I need you (I need you)
But there ain't no way-ay I'm ever gonna lo-ove you
Now don't be sad (don't be sad 'cause)
'Cause two out of three ai-ain't bad
Now don't - be-ee sad, ('cause) 'cause two out of three ain't bad

You'll never find your go-old on a sandy beach
You'll never drill for oil on a city street
I know you're lookin' for a ruby in a mountain of rocks
But there ain't no Coupe de Ville hidin' at the bottom of a Cracker Jack box

I can't lie (I can't lie...)
I can't tell you that I'm somethin' I'm not
No matter how I try, I'll never be able
To give you somethin', somethin' that I just haven't got (woh-oh)

Well there's only one girl that I will ever love
And that was so many year-ears ago
And though I know I'll never get her out of my heart
She never loved me back, ooh-ooh I know

Well I remember how she left me on a stormy night
Ahh, she kissed me and got out of our bed
And though I pleaded and I begged her not to walk out that door
She packed her bags and turned right away-ay-ay
And she kept on tellin' me

Bonus selection! Loving You - Minnie Riperton

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 19:12:00 +0000

Selected by Debbie's cow-orkers, this gem is a true stinker, as bad as any we've had. I do, however, have a good video to go with it:

Loving you
Is easy because you're beautiful....
Making love with you
Is all I want to do....
Loving you
Is more than just a dream come true....
And everything that I do
Is out of loving you....

No one else can make me feel
The colors that you bring....
Stay with me while we grow old....
And we will live each day in spring time....

Because loving you....
Has made my life so beautiful....
And every day of my life
Is filled with loving you....
Loving you....
I see your soul come shining through....
And everytime that we....
Oh I'm more in love with you....

La la la la la
La la la la la
La la la la la la la la la la la
Ooo ee oo ee oo

Total Eclipse of the Heart - Bonnie Tyler

noreply@blogger.com (Pasha) — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 17:43:00 +0000

Argh. I say, argh. Contributed by Debbie.

Today's video is a special one: it's Bonnie Tyler doing the song as a duet with Xena Warrior Princess. Yow!

Turnaround, Every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you're never coming round
Turnaround, Every now and then I get a little bit tired of listening to the sound of my tears
Turnaround, Every now and then I get a little bit nervous that the best of all the years have gone by
Turnaround, Every now and then I get a little bit terrified and then I see the look in your eyes
Turnaround bright eyes, Every now and then I fall apart
Turnaround bright eyes, Every now and then I fall apart

Turnaround, Every now and then I get a little bit restless and I dream of something wild
Turnaround, Every now and then I get a little bit helpless and I'm lying like a child in your arms
Turnaround, Every now and then I get a little bit angry and I know I've got to get out and cry
Turnaround, Every now and then I get a little bit terrified but then I see the look in your eyes
Turnaround bright eyes, Every now and then I fall apart
Turnaround bright eyes, Every now and then I fall apart

And I need you now tonight
And I need you more than ever
And if you only hold me tight
We'll be holding on forever
And we'll only be making it right
Cause we'll never be wrong together
We can take it to the end of the line
Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time
I don't know what to do and I'm always in the dark
We're living in a powder keg and giving off sparks
I really need you tonight
Forever's gonna start tonight
Forever's gonna start tonight

Once upon a time I was falling in love
But now I'm only falling apart
There's nothing I can do
A total eclipse of the heart
Once upon a time there was light in my life
But now there's only love in the dark
Nothing I can say
A total eclipse of the heart

INSTRUMENTAL

Turnaround bright eyes
Turnaround bright eyes
Turnaround, Every now and then I know you'll never be the boy you always wanted to be
Turnaround, Every now then I know you'll always be the only boy who wanted me the way that I am
Turnaround, Every now and then I know there's no one in the universe as magical and wonderous as you
Turnaround, Every now and then I know there's nothing any better and there's nothing that I just wouldn't do
Turnaround bright eyes, Every now and then I fall apart
Turnaround bright eyes, Every now and then I fall apart

And I need you now tonight
And I need you more than ever
And if you'll only hold me tight
We'll be holding on forever
And we'll only be making it right
Cause we'll never be wrong together
We can take it to the end of the line
Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time
I don't know what to do and I'm always in the dark
We're living in a powder keg and giving off sparks
I really need you tonight
Forever's gonna start tonight
Forever's gonna start tonight

Once upon a time I was falling in love
But now I'm only falling apart
Nothing I can do
A total eclipse of the heart
Once upon a time there was light in my life
But now there's only love in the dark
Nothing I can say
A total eclipse of the heart